Bicara poligami…(15)

Ada seorang ustaz, da’ie, harakiyy, pernah berkata utk memahami syariat poligami di dalam Islam biasanya orang yg berumur 40 tahun ke atas. Saya menambah… umur 37 thn, 38 thn pun boleh memahaminya juga.

Saya bimbang sebenarnya bila mendengar perkataan tidak rela, tidak suka, benci, menyampah, meluat, ttg syariat poligami ini.

Misalan yg ingin saya utarakan di sini spt berikut:

Saya tidak rela ayah saya mengamalkan poligami, sebab saya tidak suka syariat poligami. Kenapa tidak suka syariat poligami sebab ayah saya tidak layak utk berpoligami. Sebab apa ayah saya tidak layak berpoligami sebab dia masih kurang penglibatannya dalam dakwah. Jadi dia masih tidak layak utk berpoligami sehinggalah ayah saya menjadi seorang da’ie yang komited, yang taat beribadah macam ‘alim ulama’. Apa syarat poligami sebagaimana yang Allah Taala nyatakan di dalam Al-Quran? Allah Taala berfirman sekiranya kamu boleh berlaku adil kamu boleh mengahwini wanita-wanita dua, tiga, atau empat. Sekiranya kamu takut tidak boleh berlaku adil kahwini seorang sahaja.

Kenapa kamu tidak rela? Sebab kamu benci kepada syariat poligami. Sebab kamu selalu tonton di dalam TV, filem banyak keburukan ttg poligami. Sebab apa kamu kata syariat poligami buruk sebab kamu tak jumpa contoh yang baik. Mungkin sebab kamu tak baca sirah Islam, bagaimana terdapat banyak contoh2 para sahabat Baginda, tabi’in dan banyak lagi yang menunjukkan contoh yg baik. Kamu tak yakin apa yg Allah Taala turunkan iaitu syariat poligami? Kamu tak baca Al-Quran surah Al-Nisaa’ ayat 3? Atau kamu skip (langkah) saja ayat itu dan baca ayat2 yg lain saja? Bolehkah kamu tinggalkan satu ayat di dalam Al-Quran sebab kamu tidak suka syariat itu? Jawapannya sudah tentu tak boleh sebab kita WAJIB beriman kepada Al-Quran keseluruhannya.

Nasihat saya: Belajarlah daripada guru/ustaz yg ikhlas dan berpengalaman…ilmu bukan semata-mata melalui buku tetapi banyaknya datang dari pengalaman hidup.

Marilah kita sama-sama bertaubat sebelum kita dipanggil pulang oleh Allah Taala dalam keadaan kita membenci syariatnya. Astaghfirullah, astaghfirullah, astaghfirullah…

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Women, Polygamy and Islam

It has been considered for years that Islam does not give equal rights to men and women, and consider women only subject of comfort for males. This opinion has been delivered time and time again by renowned women activists but their basis of arguments being only the alleged facts. Their main argument is against the permission given towards polygamy in Islam. But many scholars who have gone through the pain in studying what Islam actually says have different opinion. They agree, in general, that Islam’s approach to polygamy is most balanced and rational and is based on the moral, psychological and physiological demands of men and women (The Independent 13).

It should be remembered that taking more than one wife is only permissible, not ordained by the Quran – as some ‘progressive’ activist would like to believe. The Quranic verse that allows polygamy should be read in the context it was revealed. The Verse says, “And if you fear that you cannot act equitably towards orphans, then marry such women as seem good to you, two, three and four, but if you fear that you may not do justice to them, then (marry) only one” (4: 3). This verse was revealed after the battle of Uhud. In that battle, many Muslim men died and as such a great social problem for the protection of widows and orphans arose, necessitating an institutionalized polygamy for a convenient solution of the problem.

Some of the eminent Western scholars who actually studied Islam, quite blatantly criticized the Western and other self proclaimed writers for venting their opinion as facts. In her book The Life and Teachings of Muhammed, Dr. Annie Besant, the renowned English leader of Theosophical Movement, says: ” There is pretended monogamy in the West, but in reality, there is polygamy without responsibility; the mistress is cast off when the man is weary of her … the first lover has no responsibility for her future, and she is a hundred times worst off then the sheltered wife in a polygamous home. “When we see thousands of miserable women who crowd the streets of Western towns during the night, we must surely feel that it does not lie in the Western mouth to reproach Islam for polygamy. It is better for woman, happier for woman, more respectable for woman to live in polygamy, united to one man, only with a legitimate child in her arms and surrounded with respect, than to be seduced and then cast out into the streets perhaps with illegitimate child outside the rule of law, uncared, unsheltered, to become victim of any passer-by, night after night, rendered incapable of motherhood despised by all. “You can find others,” continues Annie Besant, “stating that religion Islam is evil because it sanctions a limited polygamy. But you do not hear as a rule the criticism … that monogamy with a blended mass of prostitution was a hypocrisy and more degrading than a limited polygamy. “… it must be remembered that the law of Islam in relation to women was until lately, when parts of it was imitated initiated in England, the most just law, as far as women are concerned, to be found in the world. Dealing with property, …rights of succession,… cases of divorce, it was far beyond the law of the West, in the respect which was paid to the rights of women. Those things are forgotten while people are hypnotized by the words monogamy and polygamy and do not look at what lies behind it in the West – the frightful degradation of women…”

Divorce in Islam

The next point of confrontation regarding women is the issue of divorce. It is a well accepted thought that Islam allows the husband to get rid of his wife on his free will, any time he likes by uttering a particular word three times repeatedly. This idea is totally baseless and has got nothing to do with Islam is quite clear when one takes the pain of studying it. first of all, the marriage in Islam is a social contract, and it can be dissolved if it proves, in any way, injurious or incompatible to the wife or to the husband. The wife has been given as much right to obtain the divorce as the husband. But the process of divorce has been set with a time limit of three months, so that a major decision like this is not taken in a moment of anger, and then both of them reproaches it after their anger vents out. This has been clearly instructed in the Holy Quran, but made unnecessarily confused by some elite class to suite their own purpose. On the Timing of divorce: ” O Prophet! if ye do divorce woman, divorce them at their prescribed periods, and count (accurately) their prescribed periods: And fear Allah, your Lord: And turn them not out of your houses, nor shall they (themselves) leave, except in case they are guilty of open lewdness ” (LXV: 1). On waiting periods for divorced women: ” Divorced woman must wait three monthly courses. And it is not lawful for them to hide what Allah has created in their wombs, if they sincerely believe in Allah and the last day…” (2:228) Thus a clear three months period is mandatory before the final pronouncement is to be given. Each pronouncement of Talaq has to be made with a month’s increment between it, so that their is chance that the couple repents and decide to continue their life together. After all, the prophet’s saying goes ‘Divorce is most disliked by Allah among all permissible things.’ As women have got full rights to decide on to their separations, they also have full rights to chose partners in marriage, which is against what the ‘learned’ class would like to believe. No marriage in Islam is valid unless the bride and the bride-groom give their verbal consents regarding their marriage.

Status of Women in Islam

The status given to the women by Islam is another point of conflict as most of the “literate lots” would very much like to believe that women in Islam are still unliberated. However, it would be pointless to defend Islam by saying that Islam did give Women full equality in all respect to men (as some scholars defending Islam tried to do), as in reality, Islam does recognize the fact that women and men have their differences on the basis of their physical and physiological aspects, which is clearly stated in the Holy Quran in the following verses: “… Wives have the same rights as the husbands have on them in accordance with the generally known principles. Ofcourse, men are a degree above them in status, and above all is Allah, the All-Mighty, the All-Wise” (2: 228). “Men are in charge of women because Allah has made the one superior to the other and because men spend their wealth on women” (4: 34).

Thus, in Islam, men and women have absolute equality in stature, but with a complete difference in labor. Being subjected to the responsibility of taking care of the house-holds, is considered somewhat degrading nowadays, forwarding the possible idea that Islam has kept women away from nation building. But if we are to consider Napoleon’s saying that ‘Give me a good mother; I will give you a good nation’, then we can see that in reality nation building starts at home, and failure to learn correct guidance at home would lead the generations to degrade, without even being concerned over it. In fact the Islamic concept of household is that it is the smallest unit in the greater organization of the Nation as a whole. The home is a little kingdom where authority is exercised by both husband and wife.

Source: http://members.tripod.com/islamiczone/women.htm

Can We Want to Marry?

Question and Answer Details

Name of Questioner

Shereen

 

Title

Can We Want to Marry?

 

Date

08/Jun/2006

 

Question

Is it right for girls to wish that they want to get engaged even though the parents are not planning to get her engaged any time soon? What if it is just a wish and there is not any guy whom she loves?

 

 

 

Topic

Marriage

 

Name of Counselor

Sahar El-Nadi

Answer

Salam, Sister Shereen.

 

Thank you for trusting our page with your dreams. We wish you and all Muslims joyful lives in stable homes.

 

Your question implies that you’re probably a teenager, so I’m proud of you for your maturity, choosing to consult before getting involved in a relationship. May Allah always guide you to what pleases Him.

 

Romantic daydreaming is part of a stage in everyone’s life, where emotions take us on sentimental journeys to imaginary worlds with invented people. However, as good Muslims, we shouldn’t let daydreaming waste our lives! So what should we do? Stop dreaming or do something useful with our dreams?

 

There is nothing wrong with wishing to find a mate as Allah decreed for humans. Your feelings are quite natural and they’re recognized by Islam. Love as a pure emotion for the right person under proper guidelines is actually encouraged in Islam. What’s forbidden is abusing love to fulfill desires without legal commitment.

 

I must ask you here: do you want to get engaged to be married and bear the heavy responsibility of a Muslim home, or just to have a man in your life to “have fun with” as seen in movies and musical videos? Please be careful, because while pop culture pressures us to look for “sexy” people who can turn heads, Islam teaches us to look for righteous people who can turn souls!

 

We must not let our rush —to be in love— drag us into dangerous situations with the wrong people. You need, first, to know the Islamic guidance on how to choose a good Muslim husband and how to be a good Muslim future-wife to be chosen by one.

 

All parents dream of seeing their daughters married, and I’m sure your parents want what’s best for you, so they probably have good reasons for postponing that. They probably see you are still unprepared, due to your young age or your need to reach a certain level of education first.

 

In any relationship, we have to fulfill certain responsibilities first in order to earn our rights. So, while you are dreaming of your right to be engaged, it’s wise to explore the responsibilities attached and check if you’re prepared to handle them yet.

 

A Muslim has a responsibility to invest every moment of precious life in doing something useful. So, try turning your wishes into energy to make you a better Muslim, who is ready for taking charge of a home. Here are some suggestions:

 

1- It is a psychological fact that we grow into the images we make for ourselves. So try to imagine a detailed vision of yourself as a good and correct Muslim wife and mother, and ask yourself: how am I going to be that woman? How do I make that dream come true?

 

2- Do you have a role model? Someone you look up to and want to grow like? Is that person worthy of your admiration and pleases Allah. Or do you have the wrong example on a poster above your bed? Do you read and listen to lectures about women who made a difference for our Ummah (Muslim nation)? If not, my advice is that you search to know them and study their personal biographies and extract lessons for yourself to live by and to follow until the right man comes along.

 

3- You need to make an effort to prepare yourself for handling the pressures of our modern world too, so consider in parallel with learning your religion, to focus on your role in life. Why has Allah created you and what is your mission in this world? What is your goal for the next life and how are you going to get there? Keep an eye on the news of the world in all aspects of life; learn computer and Internet skills and languages. Search how to lead a healthy life and how to be physically fit. You will need to be fit to manage a successful life. Read about good housekeeping, home budgeting, successful relationships, effective communication, child upbringing, decoration, crafts and healthy cooking. Attend classes in those and other topics to improve your skills.

 

Once you are fully prepared for your responsibilities and you have chosen the right Muslim man to be the focus of your dreams, make sure to adjust your niyyah (intention). Raising a good Muslim family with your dream-man should be with the intention of pleasing God Almighty and Prophet Muhammad (peace be upon him).

 

Your question indicates that you are a good person Shereen, so I don’t need to remind you to listen to your parents. Please don’t do anything behind their back. Get them involved in your matters and ask for their guidance as soon as you meet someone you like. If you want Allah to bless your future life, make sure that your path to Him passes through the hearts of your parents.

 

Also, bare in mind that this man —when you find him— is not a mahram to you (not legal husband, brother or father, etc.) until he is legally your husband, so your behavior with him should reflect the Islamic teachings you respect. Don’t let emotions lead you into what may displease Allah. If Allah has destined him for you, then there will be plenty of time, after you become officially husband and wife, to express your feelings for each other. However, if he is not meant for you, then why commit something you will regret later?

 

Until that time comes —and I pray that Allah may send him soon to you— would you consider sharing the pure love in your heart with those who really need it? Think of joining a charity to take care of orphan kids or weak animals and lavish your love on them. Besides giving you an outlet for your feelings, it will also hopefully gain you enough rearward to grant you Allah’s approval and pleasure. He is the Only One Who can give you what you want, so never stop making du`a’ and good deeds.

 

We will pray for you too, and may Allah guide all Muslims to suitable mates and support them in raising good Muslim families, amen.

 

I hope this answers your question. If you have any other questions, please do not hesitate to send us again. Thank you and please keep in touch.

 

Salam.

 

Useful Links:

 

Purity of Man-Woman Relationship

 

To Love or to Know, What Comes First?

 

Distinguishing Culture from Religion Concerning Marriage

 

Parents Opinion in Marriage

 

Asking God for the Right Mate

 

The Philosophy of Marriage in Islam

 

My Parents Refuse the Person I Love: What to Do?

 

Du`a’ to Hasten Marriage

 

Foundation of Successful Marriage

 

1,2,3’s of Marital Life

 

Love in Islam

 

 

Woman’s Marriage: Necessary?

Question : Respected scholars, as-salamu `alaykum. I am a 26 year old female and my parents are asking me to get married but I want to be single all my life. I am afraid of this commitment because I have seen my parents’ dysfunctional marriage. And is it necessary for a woman to marry? Jazakum Allahu Khayran.

 

Answer : Wa `alaykum As-Salamu wa Rahmatullahi wa Barakatuh.

 

In the Name of Allah, Most Gracious, Most Merciful.

 

All praise and thanks are due to Allah, and peace and blessings be upon His Messenger.

 

Thanks for your interesting question, which reflects your deep belief in the fact that Islam has answers for every problem facing mankind. Our utmost wish is just for all of us to adhere to the teachings of this great religion which came to save mankind from the peril of succumbing to the material life, to rescue it from darkness and following whims and self inclinations, and bring it into the light of guidance and eternal prosperity.

 

Although marriage is generally considered a highly recommended act, from the Islamic point of view marriage differs according to the state and conditions of each person: It can be highly recommended in some cases, or even obligatory under certain conditions. It can also be prohibited or only permitted under other circumstances.

 

In his response to your question, Sheikh Ahmad Kutty, a senior lecturer and Islamic scholar at the Islamic Institute of Toronto, Ontario, Canada , states the following:

While you are advised to be respectful to your parents and be extremely gentle and compassionate in dealing and interacting with them, and to try your best to understand their feelings and appreciate their anxieties, the final decision about your marriage is left to you and not to them.

 

Your parents have every right to advise you and offer you the best insights they can give you, and you must thank them for this; nevertheless, when it comes to the issue of your marriage, it is you and you alone who ought to decide whether you wish to get married, when and where, and with whom. Your parents can only make suggestions. It may be in your best interest to benefit from such insights that they can offer, however, the final decision is solely yours and not theirs. For you are the one who is going to live with your marriage partner.

 

Having said this, however, I must point out that the negative views you have about marriage are due to your past experiences. To generalize based on this experience is, at best, wrong. Islam teaches us not to get carried away by impulsive, whimsical inclinations in our judgments. We must take into account all aspects of an issue before coming to a sound judgment.

 

The fact that your experience of marriage has been negative does not in any way prove that all marriages are the same. Success or failure of a marriage is dependent, in large measure, on the kind of attitudes of life one brings to it. As Muslims, we believe that the recipe for good life is contained in accepting the sovereignty of Allah and acting upon the guidance He has sent down: Allah says, [Verily this Qur’an guides (humanity) to a state of being that is most upright (and fulfilling) … ] (Al-Israa’ 17: 9).

 

Finally, in regards to your question about the precise status of marriage in Islam, the answer is that it varies according to the person and their circumstance. In other words, marriage is obligatory on those who are unable to control their desires and are afraid of falling into sin; it is recommended for all those who have desire for union and yet do not fear falling into sin; it is undesirable for those who have no desire and are afraid of fulfilling their spousal obligations; and it is clearly forbidden for those who have no desire whatsoever and are incapable of doing justice, and may end up harming or injuring their partners. An example is someone who has a sexually transmitted disease which they may end up passing to others if they get married.

 

To conclude: If you belong to the category of those who have no desire for union, and you feel you cannot fulfill the spousal obligations, then there is nothing wrong for you to remain a celibate. That decision is solely yours, and your parents have no right to force you to get married. May Allah help us see truth as truth and follow it, and may He help us to see error as error and shun it—ameen.

 

Excerpted, with slight modifications, from: http://www.islam.ca

 

 

 

 

What is the Islamic ruling on marriage? And when it is deemed obligatory?

Question and Answer Details

Name of Questioner

Mustapha   – United States

 

Title

The Islamic Ruling on Marriage

 

Question

What is the Islamic ruling on marriage? And when it is deemed obligatory?

 

Date

20/Nov/2002

 

Name of Mufti

IOL Shari`ah Researchers

Topic

Marriage

Answer


In the Name of Allah, Most Gracious, Most Merciful.
All praise and thanks are due to Allah, and peace and blessings be upon His Messenger.

Dear questioner, we commend your keenness on getting your self well-acquainted with Islam and its teachings, which is the way Allah has chosen for the welfare of His servants.

Islam – being a natural way of life – takes into account all of genuine human instincts such as physical, spiritual, intellectual, emotional, et cetera. Islam generally encourages marriage as the pure and legitimate way for regulating and fulfilling these instincts and desires. It is against both curbing man’s desires through celibacy or giving them free rein through licentiousness and sexual permissiveness.

As regards the question you posed, we’d like to state that the ruling on marriage differs according to the state and conditions of each person. It can be obligatory or recommendable under certain conditions. It can also be prohibited or only permitted under other circumstances. The different rulings on marriage are explained in the fatwa issued by the late prominent Muslim scholar and author of Fiqh As-Sunnah, Sheikh Sayyed Sabiq. He states the following:

Obligatory Marriage:

Marriage is obligatory for whoever is able to afford it, has desire for sexual intercourse, and is afraid to indulge in fornication. Here, it is obligatory because protecting oneself against fornication and preserving one’s chastity is obligatory, and this cannot be achieved except through marriage. Al-Qurtubi says: “Celibacy is not recommended for whoever is able to bear the expenses of marriage, and is likely to commit illicit affairs that violate both his honor and his religion, for one sometimes may not be able to overcome temptation except by marriage. In this case marriage is, according to a scholarly consensus, obligatory. But one who has desire for sexual intercourse, but does not have enough money for the expenditures of marital life may find solace in the words of Allah, Exalted be He, Who says: “Let those who find not the wherewithal for marriage keep themselves chaste, until Allah gives them means out of His Grace.” (An-Nur: 33)

Man is recommended to suppress his sexual appetite by fasting; a group of Hadith transmitters narrated on the authority of Ibn Mas`ud (may Allah be pleased with him) that Allah’s Messenger (peace and blessings be upon him) said: “O youth! Whoever amongst you is able to marry, let him marry, because it helps him keep his eyes away from lustful looks and preserve his chastity. And whoever is not able to marry, let him observe fasting, as it is a shield for him (i.e. protection from lapsing in fornication).”

Commendable Marriage:

One who has desire for sexual intercourse, who is able to bear the expenses of marriage, and, at the same time, is able to suppress his sexual desire, protect himself against committing illicit affairs is recommended to marry. In this case, marriage in this case is better than devoting oneself to worship, because monasticism is not a characteristic of Islam. At-Tabarani narrated on the authority of Sa`d ibn Abi Waqqas that Allah’s Messenger (peace and blessings be upon him) said: “Allah has revealed tolerant monotheism (Islam), to replace the Christians’ monasticism.” Al-Bayhaqi also narrated on the authority of Abu Umamah that the Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him) said: “Marry one another, for I will be boast of your great numbers in front of other nations (on the Day of Judgement), but don not lapse in the Christians’ monasticism.” `Umar once said to Abu Az-Zawa’id: “Nothing can make man refrain from marriage except inability or indulging in fornication.” Ibn `Abbas also said: “The faith of a devoted believer will never be perfected unless he marries.”

Prohibited Marriage:

Marriage is prohibited for anyone who cannot observe his wife’s rights, because of being undesirous for sexual intercourse due to a physical defect, or because of inability to afford marriage. Al-Qurtubi states: When man is unable to marry due to lack of money to cover the expenses of marriage, to pay the bride’s dowry, or any of her financial rights, he must not marry unless he lets the bride know of his inability, or unless he becomes able to afford marriage. And so is the case if he has some physical weakness that makes him unable to have sexual intercourse (i.e. if he is impotent); he must let his bride know of it, in order not to deceive her. Moreover, he must not pretend that he hails from a noble family, that he is a wealthy man, or that he holds a prestigious post.

The same applies to women. A woman who is unable to observe her husband’s rights, or who has some defect which prevents her husband from making love to her, such as insanity, leprosy, elephantiasis, genital or vaginal disease, must never deceive him; rather, she must let him know what is wrong with her. This is like the example of a sale contract; the seller must inform the buyer of any defect in the commodity he is purchasing.

That is to say, when one of the spouses finds some defect in his/or her mate, he/or she may annul the marriage. Thus, when the husband finds any defect in his wife, he may annul the marriage, and take back the dowry he paid her. It was narrated that the Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him) married a woman from Bayadah folk. Then he found that she was leprous in her flank, so he sent her back to her parents, and said to them. “You have deceived me.”

Imam Malik is reported to have stated two different opinions concerning the wife of the impotent, who discovers this after consummating marriage then seeks separation on account of this defect. Imam Malik once said that in such a case the wife can seek for marriage annulment and take her full dowry; his another view is that she takes half of her dowry. By and Large, Malik’s different points of view depend on his different opinions as to whether the bride’s dowry is due immediately after she allows her husband to have sex with her, or after he consummating marriage.

Permissible Marriage:

Marriage is permissible for any person who has nothing to warrant his marriage or prohibit it.”

You can also read:

Is Marriage Obligatory?

The Philosophy of Marriage in Islam

 

 

 
 

Allah Almighty knows best.

The Philosophy of Marriage in Islam

Question and Answer Details

Name of Questioner

Abu Muhammad   – United States

 

Title

The Philosophy of Marriage in Islam

 

Question

I have noticed that there is a trend inviting young people to refrain from marriage via numerous methods, including intimidating them as regards the responsibilities they are to shoulder as well as casting doubt over the institution of marriage itself. Is there a way to refute these allegations?

 

Date

10/Jul/2007

 

Name of Mufti

Yusuf Al-Qaradawi

Topic

Marriage

Answer

In the Name of Allah, Most Gracious, Most Merciful.All praise and thanks are due to Allah, and peace and blessings be upon His Messenger.

Dear brother in Islam, we would like to thank you for your very interesting question and the great confidence you place in us. We implore Allah Almighty to help us serve His cause and render our work for His Sake.
Marriage in Islam is intended to cater to multiple purposes which include, above all, spiritual tranquility and peace, and cooperation and partnership in fulfilling the divine mandate. Islam – being a natural way of life – takes into account all of genuine human instincts such as physical, spiritual, intellectual, emotional, et cetera.

Although fulfilling one’s physical needs in a decent manner is one of the main purposes of marriage, it is not the sole one. According to the clear statement of the Qur’an, tranquility and peace through a successful union is considered the primary objective of marriage: (Among His signs is that He created for you spouses of your own kind in order that you may repose to them in tranquility and He instilled in your hearts love and affection for one another; verily, in these are signs for those who reflect (on the nature of the reality).)

(Ar-Rum 30: 21).
In another place, Allah refers to the relationship between males and females in terms of partnership for achieving goodness and fulfilling the divine mandate for their lives. (The believers, males and females, are partners of one another; they shall jointly enjoin all that is good and counsel against all that is evil.)

(At-Tawbah 9: 71)
Responding to the question in point, the eminent Muslim scholar, Sheikh Yusuf Al-Qaradawi, states:

 

Just as Islam aims at rearing a righteous individual, being the cornerstone in the social structure of the nation, it also seeks to establish a sound family, the prime and essential factor in building a good society. It is never disputed that marriage – that unites a man and a woman in solemn matrimony – is the foundation that gives rise to the family. There is no way a real or proper family could ever exist out of wedlock, the way that has been legislated by Allah, Exalted be He.
Perverted ideas opposing the institution of marriage:

Throughout the ages, humanity has come to learn of ideas and trends that oppose the idea of marriage. In Persia (now Iran), before the advent of Islam, there emerged Mani’s philosophy, which claimed that the world abounds in evil, that it should be exterminated and that prohibiting marriage is the fastest way to effect this goal.

Under the banner of Christianity appeared extreme monasticism that denounces life, calls to getting incarcerated in monasteries and prohibiting marriage, because woman, they held, is a cause of temptation and a devil incarnate. Venturing near her is in itself a sin that corrupts a soul and alienates one from Heaven.

In modern times, there exist in the West pessimists who totally condemned woman, describing her as a serpent, with a soft touch but deadly venom. They further claim that marriage offers her the golden opportunity to place man under her thumb and shackle him with responsibilities. So why should man, out of his own free will, choose to place those chains around his neck though he was born free?

Unfortunately, some of our contemporary Muslim youth have been fallen prey to those perverted ideas, and thereupon decided to refrain from marriage that entails endless responsibilities, obligations and restrictions. They, on the other hand, wish to live their entire lives as children shouldering no responsibilities. If overcome by desire or the call of their instincts, vicious adultery will certainly quench their thirst in lieu of lawful marriage.

The objectives of marriage in Islam:

a) According to the divine laws and norms, nothing can ever perform its duty single-handedly. Allah meant everything to be in need of another of its kind, so that one would complement the other. In the field of electricity, positive and negative poles need to be in contact so as to induce an electric current, which in turn, yields light, heat, motion, etc. Likewise, electrons and protons should be in contact inside an atom. In plants, pollen grain carrying male gametes fertilize a flower’s stigma to produce more plants, fruits and seeds. Male and female animals have to be in contact in order to reproduce. The Glorious Qur’an highlights this universal law in the following two verses: (And all things We have created by pairs, that haply ye may reflect.) (Adh-Dhariyat 51: 49) (Glory be to Him Who created all the sexual pairs, of that which the earth groweth, and of themselves, and of that which they know not.)

(Ya-Sin 36: 36) In response to this law, Allah, Exalted be He, has legislated a sublime tradition for a man and a woman to be united in such a way as befits the lofty status of human beings, namely through marriage.
Allah, Exalted be He, has inculcated in a man’s heart a longing for a woman, and in a woman’s heart a longing for a man. Each of them is driven by a far more exigent need than hunger or thirst. Each of them senses a definite emptiness in his or her life that can only be filled with their union, according to the divine laws, namely via marriage. Only then does stability replace confusion and reassurance does replace anxiety. Each of them finds in the other serenity, love and mercy that light their lives and enrich their souls. The following is one of Allah’s glaring signs in our universe, which the Glorious Qur’an points to: (Among His signs is that He created for you spouses of your own kind in order that you may repose to them in tranquility and He instilled in your hearts love and affection for one another; verily, in these are signs for those who reflect (on the nature of the reality).)

(Ar-Rum 30: 21)
b) Reproduction is the natural outcome of marriage. It serves to prolong man’s existence, thanks to the pious progeny that succeeds him. This is thus one of Allah’s bounties which He grants man saying, (And Allah hath given you wives of your own kind, and hath given you, from your wives, sons and grandsons, and hath made provision of good things for you. Is it then in vanity that they believe and in the grace of Allah that they disbelieve?)

(An-Nahl 16: 72)
It is also for this reason that Prophet Zakariyyah (Zachariah, peace be upon him) supplicated to Allah saying: (And Zachariah, when he cried unto his Lord: My Lord! Leave me not childless, though Thou art the best of inheritors,) (Al-Anbiya’ 21: 89) and (Lo! I fear my kinsfolk after me, since my wife is barren. Oh, give me from Thy presence a successor. Who shall inherit of me and inherit (also) of the house of Jacob. And make him, my Lord, acceptable (unto Thee).) (Maryam 19: 5-6) Similarly, Ibrahim (Abraham), the father of the Prophets (peace be upon him), prayed to Allah saying: (My Lord! Vouchsafe me of the righteous. So We gave him tidings of a gentle son.) (As-Saffat 37: 100-101) and (Praise be to Allah Who hath given me, in my old age, Ishmael and Isaac! Lo! My Lord is indeed the Nearer of Prayer.) (Ibrahim 14: 29) The Glorious Qur’an describes the servants of Allah, the Most Gracious, as such: (And who say: Our Lord! Vouchsafe us comfort of our wives and of our offspring.)

(Al-Furqan 25: 74)
It is due to reproduction that the nation grows and multiplies, makes use of its potential and manages to combat its enemies. Few would suspect the fact that multitudes and masses of people are to be reckoned with when considering world power. Allah narrates what Prophet Shu`ayb (peace be upon him) told his people saying, (And remember, when ye were but few, how He did multiply you.)

(Al-A`raf 7: 86) Further, Prophet Muhammad (peace and blessings be upon him) says, “Get married (and reproduce) for I will boast of your large numbers in front of other nations (on Judgment Day) and do not lapse into Christians’ monasticism.” (Reported by al-Bayhaqi on the authority of Abu Umamah, and it is mentioned in al-Jami` as-Sahih)
Reproduction serves to preserve the entire human species all around the globe until the point when life comes to an end. Allah, Exalted be He, says, (O mankind! Be careful of your duty to your Lord Who created you from a single soul and from it created its mate and from them twain hath spread abroad a multitude of men and women.) (An-Nisa’ 4: 1) and (O mankind! Lo! We have created you male and female, and have made `you nations and tribes that ye may know one another.)

(Al-Hujurat 49: 13)
c) Marriage consummates one’s faith, spares one looking at other women, enables one to preserve his chastity and offers one a lawful means to satisfy his sexual desire. Adultery is, therefore, no longer an option. That is why the Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him) spoke of marriage saying, “It spares one looking at what one should not, or lapsing in adultery.” He (peace and blessings be upon him) also said, “If Allah grants a Muslim a righteous wife, this helps him preserve half of his religion (faith). He should, therefore, fear Allah as regards the other half.” (Reported by At-Tabarani and Al-Hakim, and Al-Mundhri states in At-Targhib that it is an authentic hadith with a good chain of narrators)

d) Not only does marriage help a Muslim preserve his faith, it is also the indispensable pillar of worldly happiness which Islam encourages its followers to enjoy so that nothing would distract them from the ultimate goal of uplifting their souls and attaining high degrees of spirituality. Imam Muslim reports that the Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him) said, “The whole world is pleasure, and the best pleasure of the world is the righteous woman.”

The Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him) is also reported to have said: “Four things bring one joy: a righteous wife, a spacious house, a pious neighbor and a comfortable riding animal.” (Reported by Al-Hakim, Abu-Nu`aym and Al-Bayhaqi)
e) Marriage is the sole means of establishing a family, the nucleus of society. No respectable human society could ever exist, if not based on the family. Shaded by the close relations of motherhood, fatherhood as well as parent-child and siblings relations, warm feelings of love, altruism, mercy, care and cooperation are instilled in a Muslim.

f) Social relations are bolstered with the aid of marriage, whereby scope of family expands including his in-laws and his children’s aunts and uncles. That way feelings of amity, love and social closeness extend to include more and more people. Allah meant relations by marriage to be just as strong as kinship relations. Allah, Exalted be He, says, (And He it is Who hath created man from water, and hath appointed for him kindred by blood and kindred by marriage; for thy Lord is ever Powerful.)

(Al-Furqan: 54)
g) Marriage matures a man’s character through the responsibilities he has to shoulder, as a husband and a father, and similarly matures a woman’s character through the responsibilities she has to shoulder, as a wife and a mother. As we have just explained, many men refrain from marriage simply because they wish to live as grown-up children with no ties to bind them, no house to unite them or responsibilities they are to undertake. Such people are not fit to live; they are good for nothing. Marriage is thus a strong commitment and a shared responsibility between a man and a woman since their first day together.

Allah, Exalted be He, says, (And they (women) have rights similar to those (of men) over them in kindness, and men are a degree above them. Allah is Mighty, Wise.) (Al-Baqarah 2: 228) (Men are in charge of women, because Allah hath men the one of them to excel the other, and because they spend of their property (for the support of women). So good women are the obedient, guarding in secret that which Allah hath guarded.)

(An-Nisa’ 4: 34)
The Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him) said: “Everyone of you is a guardian and responsible for those in his charge; the man, in his home, is a guardian and responsible for his household; the woman, concerning her husband’s property, is a guardian and responsible for what she is entrusted with.” (Agreed upon hadith) The Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him) also said, “Man would be committing a huge sin if he were to ruin whomever he supports.” (Reported by Ahmad, Abu Dawud, Al-Hakim and Al-Bayhaqi on the authority of Ibn `Umar) The Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him) further noted, “Allah shall ask every guardian about what he has been entrusted with, whether he preserved or ruined it.” (Reported by An-Nasa’i and Ibn Hibban on the authority of Anas) He (peace and blessings be upon him) also said, “One’s spouse is entitled to certain rights.” (Agreed upon Hadith, reported on the authority of Ibn `Umar)

h) Having got married, a man can focus on perfecting his work, reassured that there is someone back home who disposes of his affairs, preserves his money and takes care of his children. He can thus do his job properly. This stands in sharp contrast to another whose mind is preoccupied and who is torn apart between his work and home, his job and the burden of securing his food and clothes back home.

 

 

 

Related Questions

The Islamic Ruling on Marriage

Is Marriage Obligatory?

 
  

 

Allah Almighty knows best.

Does the Qur’an Disrespect Women?

Question and Answer Details

Name of Questioner

Anonymous   – Afghanistan

 

Title

Does the Qur’an Disrespect Women?

 

Question

The Qur’an says that  a woman is like a field for you, so go to them in every way you like. Does that mean that the woman is an object for the man, and that the woman is only there for the man to have intercourse and fun with? Why is the woman a field for the man? Why does the Qur’an most of the time speak to men and not to women as well?

 

Date

10/Jan/2008

 

Name of Mufti

`Abdel Khaliq Hasan Ash-Shareef

Topic

Misconceptions

Answer

In the Name of Allah, Most Gracious, Most Merciful.


All praise and thanks are due to Allah, and peace and blessings be upon His Messenger.


Dear questioner, thank you for your question.
 
 

 

 

To understand the descriptions mentioned in the Qur’an correctly, one ought to understand the contexts and  topics in which these descriptions are mentioned, and above all understand the language of the Qur’an. As for the specific example you mentioned in your question, the Qur’an described women as a ’tilth’; it did not refer to them as an object. Rather, they were described as such in the context of stating what is permissible and impermissible between a husband and his wife during intercourse. Second, when the Qur’an uses ‘masculine address’ it does not exclude women nor does it degrade them in any way, as one of the original usages of  ‘masculine address’ in the Arabic language is to address a general mass that includes both men and women.
 

 

In response to your question, Sheikh `Abdel Khaliq Hassan Ash-Shareef, an Egypt-based renowned scholar and da`iyah, says,

 


This is not the only way  Allah the Almighty described women in the Glorious Qur’an. Describing them in a certain way does not mean this is the only way they are described. Allah the Almighty says in the Qur’an:

 

[They are your garments and ye are their garments.] (Al-Baqarah 2: 187)
[How can ye take it (back) after one of you hath gone in unto the other, and they have taken a strong pledge from you?](An-Nisaa’  4: 21)
[And of His signs is this: He created for you helpmeets from yourselves that ye might find rest in them, and He ordained between you love and mercy. Lo! Herein indeed are portents for folk who reflect.] (Ar-Rum 30: 21)

As you can see, this  is not the only description of women in the Qur’an.
In addition, you have to understand the context in which they were described as a ’tilth’. Allah the Almighty says,[Your women are a tilth for you (to cultivate) so go to your tilth as ye will, and send (good deeds) before you for your souls, and fear Allah, and know that ye will (one day) meet Him. Give glad tidings to believers, (O Muhammad).] (

Al-Baqarah 2: 223)
To understand the context of this verse, you should  read the verse before it which states,[They question thee (O Muhammad) concerning menstruation. Say: It is an illness, so let women alone at such times and go not in unto them till they are cleansed. And when they have purified themselves, then go in unto them as Allah hath enjoined upon you. Truly Allah loveth those who turn unto Him, and loveth those who have a care for cleanness.] (

Al-Baqarah 2: 222)
Allah the Almighty described women as such in the context of talking about menstruation, stating what is permissible and what is not during intercourse between a husband and his wife. Therefore, you should not take this out of  context to draw such a generalization.
With regard to your question about why the Qur’an talks to men and not to women, it is said in the Glorious Qur’an,[And the believers, men and women, are protecting allies one of another; they enjoin the right and forbid the wrong, and they establish worship and they pay the poor-due, and they obey Allah and His messenger. As for these, Allah will have mercy on them. Lo! Allah is Mighty, Wise.] (

At-Tawbah 9: 71) Women are not excluded in any way whatsoever.
Moreover, one of the original usages of ‘masculine address’ in the Arabic language is to address a general group that includes both men and women.  Therefore,  one ought to understand the language of the Qur’an first before drawing any conclusions.
 

 

 

Related Questions

Are Women Equal to Men in Reward and Punishment?

The Status of Woman in Islam

Can Muslims Celebrate Christmas?

Are Women Inferior to Men?

Are Women Intellectually and Spiritually Inferior?

Was Eve Behind Adam’s Expulsion from Paradise?

The Reward of Women in Paradise

 
   

 

Allah Almighty knows best.

Source: http://www.islamonline.net/

Most Common Questions asked by Non-Muslims

POLYGAMY

 

Question:

Why is a man allowed to have more than one wife in Islam? i.e. why is polygamy allowed in Islam?

Answer:

Definition of Polygamy

1.  

Polygamy means a system of marriage whereby one person has more than one spouse. Polygamy can be of two types. One is polygyny where a man marries more than one woman, and the other is polyandry, where a woman marries more than one man. In Islam, limited polygyny is permitted; whereas polyandry is completely prohibited.

 

 


2.  The Qur’an is the only religious scripture in the world that says,”marry only one”.

The Qur’an is the only religious book, on the face of this earth, that contains the phrase ‘marry only one’. There is no other religious book that instructs men to have only one wife. In none of the other religious scriptures, whether it be the Vedas, the Ramayan, the Mahabharat, the Geeta, the Talmud or the Bible does one find a restriction on the number of wives. According to these scriptures one can marry as many as one wishes. It was only later, that the Hindu priests and the Christian Church restricted the number of wives to one.

Many Hindu religious personalities, according to their scriptures, had multiple wives. King Dashrat, the father of Rama, had more than one wife. Krishna had several wives.

In earlier times, Christian men were permitted as many wives as they wished, since the Bible puts no restriction on the number of wives. It was only a few centuries ago that the Church restricted the number of wives to one.

Polygyny is permitted in Judaism. According to Talmudic law, Abraham had three wives, and Solomon had hundreds of wives. The practice of polygyny continued till Rabbi Gershom ben Yehudah (95% C.E to 1030 C.E) issued an edict against it. The Jewish Sephardic communities living in Muslim countries continued the practice till as late as 1950, until an Act of the Chief Rabbinate of Israel extended the ban on marrying more than one wife.


3.  Hindus are more polygynous than Muslims

The report of the ‘Committee of The Status of Woman in Islam’, published in 1975 mentions on page numbers 66 and 67 that the percentage of polygamous marriages between the years 1951 and 1961 was 5.06% among the Hindus and only 4.31% among the Muslims. According to Indian law only Muslim men are permitted to have more than one wife. It is illegal for any non-Muslim in India to have more than one wife. Despite it being illegal, Hindus have more multiple wives as compared to Muslims. Earlier, there was no restriction even on Hindu men with respect to the number of wives allowed. It was only in 1954, when the Hindu Marriage Act was passed that it became illegal for a Hindu to have more than one wife. At present it is the Indian Law that restricts a Hindu man from having more than one wife and not the Hindu scriptures.

Let us now analyse why Islam allows a man to have more than one wife.


4.   Qur’an permits limited polygyny

As I mentioned earlier, Qur’an is the only religious book on the face of the earth that says ‘marry only one’. The context of this phrase is the following verse from Surah Nisa of the Glorious Qur’an:

“Marry women of your choice, two, or three, or four; but if ye fear that ye shall not be able to deal justly (with them), then only one.”

                                  [Al-Qur’an 4:3]

Before the Qur’an was revealed, there was no upper limit for polygyny and many men had scores of wives, some even hundreds. Islam put an upper limit of four wives. Islam gives a man permission to marry two, three or four women, only on the condition that he deals justly with them.

In the same chapter i.e. Surah Nisa verse 129 says:

“Ye are never able to be fair and just as between women….”

                                 [Al-Qur’an 4:129]

Therefore polygyny is not a rule but an exception. Many people are under the misconception that it is compulsory for a Muslim man to have more than one wife.

Broadly, Islam has five categories of Do’s and Don’ts:

         i.            Fard i.e. compulsory or obligatory

       ii.            Mustahab’ i.e. recommended or encouraged

      iii.            Mubah’ i.e. permissible or allowed

      iv.            Makruh’ i.e. not recommended or discouraged

        v.            Haraam’ i.e. prohibited or forbidden

Polygyny falls in the middle category of things that are permissible. It cannot be said that a Muslim who has two, three or four wives is a better Muslim as compared to a Muslim who has only one wife.


5.  Average life span of females is more than that of males

By nature males and females are born in approximately the same ratio. A female child has more immunity than a male child. A female child can fight the germs and diseases better than the male child. For this reason, during the pediatric age itself there are more deaths among males as compared to the females.

During wars, there are more men killed as compared to women. More men die due to accidents and diseases than women. The average life span of females is more than that of males, and at any given time one finds more widows in the world than widowers.


6.   India has more male population than female due to female foeticide and infanticide

India is one of the few countries, along with the other neighbouring countries, in which the female population is less than the male population. The reason lies in the high rate of female infanticide in India, and the fact that more than one million female foetuses are aborted every year in this country, after they are identified as females. If this evil practice is stopped, then India too will have more females as compared to males.


7.   World female population is more than male population

In the USA, women outnumber men by 7.8 million. New York alone has one million more females as compared to the number of males, and of the male population of New York one-third are gays i.e sodomites. The U.S.A as a whole has more than twenty-five million gays. This means that these people do not wish to marry women. Great Britain has four million more females as compared to males. Germany has five million more females as compared to males. Russia has nine million more females than males. God alone knows how many million more females there are in the whole world as compared to males.


8.   Restricting each and every man to have only one wife is not practical

Even if every man got married to one woman, there would still be more than thirty million females in U.S.A who would not be able to get husbands (considering that America has twenty five million gays). There would be more than four million females in Great Britain, 5 million females in Germany and nine million females in Russia alone who would not be able to find a husband.

Suppose my sister happens to be one of the unmarried women living in USA, or suppose your sister happens to be one of the unmarried women in USA. The only two options remaining for her are that she either marries a man who already has a wife or becomes public property. There is no other option. All those who are modest will opt for the first.

In Western society, it is common for a man to have mistresses and/or multiple extra-marital affairs, in which case, the woman leads a disgraceful, unprotected life. The same society, however, cannot accept a man having more than one wife, in which women retain their honourable, dignified position in society and lead a protected life.

Thus the only two options before a woman who cannot find a husband is to marry a married man or to become public property. Islam prefers giving women the honourable position by permitting the first option and disallowing the second.

There are several other reasons, why Islam has permitted limited polygyny, but it is mainly to protect the modesty of women.

 

This question and answer is extracted from Most Common Questions asked by Non-Muslims by Dr. Zakir Naik

 

 

Multiple Wives in Paradise: What Is for Women?

Name of Questioner

Muslimah   – United Kingdom

 

Title

Multiple Wives in Paradise: What Is for Women?

 

Question

As-salamu `alaykum. Some traditional Muslims believe that Muslim men will be rewarded with 70 houris specially created for them and two believing women from this life. This is very demeaning and offensive to all women.A question comes to my mind at this point. Why would God cause jealousy between husband and wife on this earth when He promises to give the same cause of jealousy (multiple wives) in Heaven to one gender (man) as a reward? Who put love, mercy, and affection between the spouses? It is sad to find that in traditional Muslim literature the concept of Heaven is a place specially created for men; there is no equality between men and women.For men, Heaven is simply an extension of the earth where they established control and dominance over women through legitimizing unsanctioned polygamy and unlimited sex with females. One man’s Heaven is a woman’s Hell. This is supported by scholars, as a majority of them state that Paradise is a place of fulfillment of desires, and men—being prone to polygamy—will receive this as a reward.

My question is, how is it possible that Allah Almighty will grant the fulfillment of the desires of the male but not of the female—that is, to not share her husband with multiple women?

What about women who are patient in this life, hoping that their desire of not sharing their husbands will come true? I have read that scholars state that Allah will remove the “jealousy” from the heart of the women so they shouldn’t worry about it. Please explain how does this justify anything?

Instead of her desire/wish being fulfilled, she will be brainwashed, but on the other hand men won’t have to give up anything. Why won’t Allah remove the lust to have multiple wives from their hearts in order to please the female servants, while He will remove jealousy from the hearts of females in order to please male servants?

How come jealousy is a “female” product? When men are jealous, their jealousy is labeled as “ghayrah” (attack on morality). Bur when women are “jealous”, they are labeled as jealous beings? How I see it, being neutral, jealousy is a human product and not just a female thing. Allah created one mate, at least that’s what is mentioned in the Qur’an, for Adam (peace be upon him).

Therefore it is the fitrah of every male and female to feel “jealousy” when it is about sharing one’s spouse. Men are more possessive and would react in a similar way, even worse when it is about sharing their spouse. The reason is because we are both human beings. I totally agree with the “acceptance” of polygamy in this life, because it is a “solution” advised in the situations to avoid the haram. But it is discouraged by putting conditions on it. But paradise is every Muslim’s (men and women) goal. It doesn’t sound/feel right to the fitrah that it will be more rewarding towards men and again will require females to sacrifice and share. No matter how you put it, it is sharing the reward when one’s husband will have at least two other wives.

Does Allah love men more than women? A male martyr will receive 70 wives, but if a female servant of Allah dies for Jihad fisabillillah, she will still be required to share her husband with other wives. This concept is very discouraging and offensive towards Muslim sisters.

I personally feel like crying because it seems that no matter how hard I work to please Allah, even go as far as giving up my life for Allah Almighty, my reward will not be equivalent to that of a male servant.

 

 

Date

23/Aug/2005

 

Name of Counsellor

Sano Koutoub Moustapha

Topic

Muslim Creed, Muslim Belief, The Unseen

Answer

Wa `alaykum as-salamu wa rahmatullahi wa barakatuh.In the Name of Allah, Most Gracious, Most Merciful.All praise and thanks are due to Allah, and peace and blessings be upon His Messenger.

Sister, first of all, we’d like to say that we are impressed by your question, which emanates from a thoughtful heart. May Allah Almighty help us all adhere to the principles of this true religion, Islam, and enable us to be among the dwellers of Paradise in the Hereafter.

Paradise is the abode of the believers in the Hereafter. Allah has prepared for His believing servants, males and females, in Paradise indescribable bliss which no eye has seen, no ear has heard of, and that has never ever crossed the minds of people, to the extent that even the person who has the least blessings in Paradise will think that he is the most blessed one.

In more than one Qur’anic verse, Allah Most High, calls upon His servants to do their utmost in order to be favored with Paradise. For example, He says, (And vie one with another for forgiveness from your Lord, and for a Paradise as wide as are the heavens and the earth, prepared for those who ward off (evil).) (Aal `Imran 3: 133)

As regards your question, we’d like to inform you that in Paradise believing men and women will be showered with blessings; there is no room for discrimination based on sex in Paradise. The life of women in jannah will be as pleasant and happy as the life of men. Allah is not partial to any sex. He created both of them and He will take care of both of them according to their needs and desires. Let us all work to achieve the jannah and then, in sha’ Allah, we will find there what will satisfy all of us fully.

In his response to your question, Dr. Sano Koutoub Moustapha, professor of Fiqh and its Principles, International Islamic University, Malaysia, states the following:

Thank you so much for your very interesting comments and understanding of the issue of polygamy and the blessings given to men in Heaven.

I congratulate you for your logical ability and critical way of looking at things. However, I shall also confirm to you the issue of polygamy, be it in this life or the hereafter, it should not be classified as a privilege but rather a solution as you correctly mentioned in your arguments.

In other words, Islam does not open the door of polygamy for all men as it does not open it to women at all. As you may know well that each ruling or law has an exception and the exception is not the principle, therefore, we can not judge a law through its exceptions.

In this regard, I shall remind you that rewarding a mujahid with many wives doesn’t mean betraying the female mujahid.

It simply means there is a such reward for those mujahids who are looking for it. In other words, there is no compulsion upon all mujahids to accept or reject this reward. It is exactly the same thing as the polygamy in this life.

It is meant for those who want it, not for every single mujahid. Yet every Muslim man and woman who is allowed to enter Heaven is given the opportunity to get whatever he or she wants as clearly stated in the Qur’an and many Hadiths of the Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him). This means that those women who don’t want their husbands to have more could be granted this wish and desire. At the same time if the husbands of those women want to have more than them Allah is great and can satisfy each of them in the way He, the Almighty, wants.

Therefore, a woman should not be frustrated for a privilege of polygamy offered to men. This is not, for sure, at the expense of woman. Heaven is meant for both men and women, both of them are equally entitled to get what they wish for.

Certainly, there would be no clashes in their wishes, if any, the Almighty knows how to please each of them. Having said that, I shall inform you that the existing setup of humans in terms of desire, would be changed on the Day of Judgment.

In other words, both men and women would not be allowed to enter Heaven in their existing physical makeup. They will be in a better and greater form as stated by the Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him). Both of them would enjoy living together and having whatever they wish and like.

Finally, the Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him) describes Heaven as a place where there are many things which no eyes have ever seen, no ears have ever heard before and no heart has ever felt. Let us pray the Almighty to grant us this great and wonderful place. Let us work harder and harder to be in this place. It is only through our full submission to the will and the orders of Allah that we will one day be granted this place.

 

 

The Reward of Women in Paradise

Name of Questioner

Muslimah

 

Title

The Reward of Women in Paradise

 

Question

Respected scholars, As-Salamu `alaykum. Whenever I read the Holy Qur’an, it always makes me wonder what would be the life of a female in Paradise or Jannah. The Qur’an talks about life after death and gives information that how a MAN’s life is going to be in the other life. They will live in gardens where there are rivers and trees full of fruits. But I never read a passage that describes the lives of women in Jannah. If so, please let me know where in the Qur’an I can find information in this regard. How will women be rewarded in Paradise?

 

Date

09/Dec/2004

 

Name of Mufti

IOL Shari`ah Researchers

 

Topic

The Unseen

Answer

Wa `alaykum As-Salamu wa Rahmatullahi wa Barakatuh.In the Name of Allah, Most Gracious, Most Merciful.

All praise and thanks are due to Allah, and peace and blessings be upon His Messenger.

Sister, first of all, we’d like to say that we are impressed by your question, which emanates from a thoughtful heart. May Allah Almighty help us all adhere to the principles of this true religion, Islam, and enable us to be among the dwellers of Paradise in the Hereafter, Ameen!

As regards your question, it should be clear that Paradise is the abode of happiness; all its dwellers, males or females, will be showered with Allah’s blessings and favors. There is no discrimination in this regard between men and women. It is righteousness and good deeds that elevates one’s rank in Jannah and exalts his/her position. In more than one Qur’anic verse, Allah, Most High, calls upon His servants to do their utmost in order to be favored with Paradise. For example, He says, (And vie one with another for forgiveness from your Lord, and for a Paradise as wide as are the heavens and the earth, prepared for those who ward off (evil). ) (Aal `Imran 3: 133)

In this context, Dr. Muzammil H. Siddiqi, former President of the Islamic Society of North America, states:

 

Jannah or Paradise is not for men alone. It is prepared for both, righteous men and righteous women. All the joys and blessings of Jannah are for both of them. Allah has mentioned in the Qur’an that He put both Adam and his wife Hawwa’ (Eve) in Jannah after creating them, and He told them to eat and enjoy everything (except the fruit of one tree). [See al-Baqarah 2: 35; al-A`raf 7: 19] Thus, all the trees, gardens and rivers of Jannah are made for both men and women and they both will enjoy them.

All Believers, males and females, will enter the Jannah. Allah says, ( Gardens of perpetual bliss: they shall enter there, as well as the righteous among their fathers, their spouses, and their offspring) (ar-Ra`d 13: 23)

Further, Allah says, (Indeed, the people of Paradise will be happily occupied. They and their wives shall be in shades, reclining on raised couches. There are for them fruits and there is for them all that they ask for…) (Ya-Sin 36: 55-57)

In the Hereafter Allah will say to the Believers, (Enter the Garden, you and your wives, you will be made glad. There will be brought round for them trays of gold and goblets, and therein is all that the souls desire and eyes find sweet and you will stay there forever. This is the garden, which you are made to inherit because of what you used to do. Therein for you is fruit in plenty whence to eat. ) (Az-Zukhruf 43: 70-73)

There are many other places in the Qur’an where it is mentioned that men and women both will find their reward and none will be deprived. [See: Aal `Imran 3: 195; An-Nisa’, 4: 124; An-Nahl 16: 97; Al-Ahzab 33: 35; Ghafir 40: 40]

The life of women in Jannah will be as pleasant and happy as the life of men. Allah is not partial to any gender. He created both of them and He will take care of both of them according to their needs and desires. Let us all work to achieve the Jannah and then, in sha’ Allah, we will find there what will satisfy all of us fully.

This verse clearly denotes that those women who do righteous deeds are rewarded with Paradise and given a high rank that is equal to the good deeds they have offered.

Shedding more light on this issue, we’d like to cite the following fatwa issued by the outstanding Muslim scholar, Sheikh ibn Jibreen:

There is no doubt that reward in the Hereafter encompasses both men and women. This is based on the following Qur’anic verses:

( Lo! I suffer not the work of any worker, male or female, to be lost) (Al `Imran 3: 195)

(Whosoever works righteousness, whether male or female, while he (or she) is a true believer, We will give a good life. ) (An-Nahl 16: 97)

(And whoever does righteous good deeds, being a male or a female, and is a true believer, such will enter Paradise. ) (An-Nisa 4: 124)

(Verily, the Muslims, men and women, the believers, men and women… Allah has prepared for them forgiveness and a great reward. ) (Al-Ahzab 33: 35)

Allah mentions them entering into Paradise together, saying:

(They and their wives will be in pleasant shade. ) (Ya Sin 36: 56)

(Enter Paradise, you and your wives, in happiness. ) (Az-Zukhruf 43: 70)

Allah also mentions that He will recreate women in Paradise in the following verse:

( Lo! We have created them a (new) creation. And made them virgins… ) (Al-Waqi`ah 56: 35-36) That is, Allah will recreate the elderly women and make them virgins; the same will be done for old men, Allah will make them youth.

It is also mentioned in the Hadith that the women of this worldly life have a superiority over Al-hur Al-`In due to the acts of worship and obedience that they performed in this world. Therefore, the believing women will enter Paradise just like the believing men. If a woman had a number of husbands, she, upon entering Paradise with them, would choose among them the one with the best character and behavior.

Excerpted, with slight modifications, from: http://www.uh.edu/campus/msa/articles/fatawawom/aqida.html#paradise

Thus, rest assured dear sister that Allah never wrongs anyone, male or female, nor does He, Almighty, deprive any person of his/her work’s fruit.